Today my daughter is volunteering at the zoo as a Jr. Counselor for a day camp. Since my husband is actually home today I decided to stay at the zoo and have some time for myself rather than drive back and forth. It’s a 30 minute drive, one way, so it takes up at least 2 hours of my day driving. This way it will only be 1 hour!
She had to be here at 8:30 and we left at 7:50. But she realized she forgot her phone and we had to turn around, meaning we didn’t really get going until 7:57. Which meant that she stressed the whole drive here that we would be late. Somehow I was not anxious the way I normally am. The only explanation I have is that I’m on meds. Being late is a big deal to my mom, which made it a big deal for me, which has made it a big deal for my kids. At first I said to her “We’ll be fine. You won’t even be the last one there, I’m sure.” Then I remembered something I saw that said dismissing our kids’ fears make it so they feel unheard or dismissed. So I said “But I totally understand your concern. We are cutting it closer than I usually like.” I don’t know that it helped. She was quiet the whole drive, but I pulled into the parking lot at 8:25, so she was definitely on time. I might have driven faster than usual to make sure of that.
The zoo itself didn’t open until 9, so I had time to kill before I could go inside. I chose to go to the McDonald’s right next door to have some breakfast. I had plans to video chat with friends at 9, so I thought maybe I’d use the McDonald’s wifi and chat with them there. It was too anxiety inducing, though, so I went back to the zoo parking lot and chatted with them on my phone, sitting in the car. We talked for over an hour. It was very needed, as this group of friends hasn’t really gotten to chat much in months.
Once the video call was over, I went into the zoo. I’d thought I might walk around a bit, but it’s pretty chilly outside (compared to our usual), so I decided to set up my laptop inside the cafe right across from the Tamarin enclosure. I love those little guys. They’re so cute! They have two sets of twins that were born here at the zoo, plus the parents. I don’t know if they are active because it’s cold out or because it’s morning, but they are running around like crazy. It’s fun to watch the little ones chase each other.
This week has been somewhat exhausting. With the kids home for Fall Break I’ve done a ton of driving around.
Thursday I got a message from an online friend that he was nearby because he and his girlfriend missed their connecting flight to get home from a trip when there was a delay in their first flight. They were given a hotel room and wouldn’t be flying out until 7PM. So after the kids and I had lunch with their great-aunt and I dropped my son off at a movie with friends, my daughter and I met my friend and his girlfriend at a mall near the airport. This was the first time I’d met him in person. Being that we know each other from a Social Anxiety group, it was understandably a little awkward. I know we were both experiencing some anxiety. But I’m glad we made the effort to meet up when the opportunity presented itself.
Then yesterday I attended Water Aerobics, then the kids and I met my husband at the Topgolf near his work. We decided we like the one by our house better because it was recently upgraded, but we played for 2 hours without my son getting bored and complaining, so it was definitely a win! After that we decided to try out an escape room nearby. It was set in a submarine and underwater lab. We escaped with just over 8 minutes to spare and asked for no hints (though the game guide did end up giving us 2 subtle unprompted hints). When we finished and he came inside he said “Are you trying to get me fired? You guys were too good and I didn’t have to do anything!” I’m sure that’s something that’s scripted for them, but it made the kids feel good. The last escape room we did as a family was pre-pandemic, so this experience was different. The kids were much quicker to figure out the clues than last time. At one point they were solving one puzzle while my husband and I worked on another one. In the past we’ve sort of hung back and directed their attention to clues, but there was no need this time! We all agreed that it was lots of fun and decided to go back to do another room for my birthday in a couple of weeks.
At the beginning of Fall Break my son had lamented that the week was going to be boring because we weren’t going anywhere and didn’t have plans. Well, yesterday he said the week had been exhausting. Funny how a boring week could be exhausting! Next week will be a nice reprieve and hopefully I’ll actually get some writing done! I didn’t get much done this week, sadly. But rather than feel shame about that, I’m congratulating myself on being present for my kids.
I’m hoping to do a little writing today while sitting at the zoo. I’ve got until 2:30, when my daughter will be done with camp. That’s three hours away at this point. Though the eclipse is supposed to happen soon, so I may take a break for now and head outside. But I’m not sure I want to give up this prime spot. Decisions, decisions…
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